So what are my top mummy judgy triggers? Sleep, food and crappy toys.
If I’m at the Superstore at nine o’clock on a weeknight and you’re there with your child under five I immediately think, “Don’t you know you child should be in bed by now? Can’t you see that these fluorescent lights and visual stimulation are overloading your child? Haven’t you read Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child?
I always refrain from voicing these opinions but they’re running rampant through my mind. But what do I know? Maybe you’re a single parent and this is the only time you can fit in your Superstore run. Maybe your kid is perfectly fine being up at 9 o’clock at night.
When it comes to food I want my children – both girls – to grow up with a healthy attitude toward eating, to know when they’re hungry, to stop eating when they’ve had enough and to make healthy food choices, at least most of the time. To that end I try and feed them an array of different foods, have lots of (mainly organic) fruit on hand for snacks and encourage my picky oldest child to indulge her love of hummus. I know I don’t always make the best choices for myself or them, but I also know I’m not bringing pizza pockets and pudding pops to the party, and if you do, I’ll judge you for it. And I’ll judge you too if you show up with organic grapes cut into quarters to prevent choking and homemade, trans fat-free muffins. Because judgments aren’t always negative.
Because of yoyomama I’ve done lots of research into toys, safety and open-ended play. We look out for the latest and greatest and I’ve reviewed lots and lots of amazing toys for tots. So when you buy my daughter a plastic doll that looks like a teenaged tart, well, there goes that judgement again. Aside from its plastic yuckiness, it speaks to all the things I don’t want my daughters to be obsessed with. For as long as I can help it anyway. After all, if you know me, you know I’ve got a website packed with great gift ideas and alternatives. Just saying…
And what doesn’t trigger my judginess? Your child’s tantrum in the grocery store. Admittedly pre-kids I would have judged you. But which of us hasn’t been there and cringed inwardly as we’ve attempted to stave off a tantrum by bribing out tot with a cookie or bun? Or dragged a howling child out of the store? When I see a mum or dad whose child is losing it in the grocery store I shoot them a sympathetic, been there, done that look. Because most of us have, or will, be there one day and it helps to feel as if someone understands what we’re going through in that moment.